My daughter excitedly told me she will be joining a singing contest at school. It should be the first because for two consecutive years she had been joining a poem competition. I chose the piece right away and helped her learn the song. The elimination was scheduled three days after she told me about the contest.
Today is Friday. She went to school all prepared for the elimination. She was so excited and I was excited too when she left for school.
She went home and told me she did not perform. She said she was shy. I had to admit, I was disappointed, I told her, it would have been better if she were eliminated than her not performing at all. I hurt her too, I know…and I am sorry. I should have just supported her.
She was to perform there alone, no one to support her. Good thing I was able to record one of our practices. Here is the link.
It brought back memories from when I was still young. I remembered I did not grow up with my family. Yes, I was with my aunt and my sister, but technically we were left alone. I remembered when I joined a Pageant during my college years, I was first year college. I won 1st Runner Up, not bad at all. I accepted the award with my college friends; no family member at all. I remembered it was empty. Yes, I was happy but I have no one to share it with. I may not have won the title, and it was okay, but it could have been perfect if I my family were there.
I remembered the last question that was asked, “If you were to die today, what would be your last wish?”
Back then, I was not sure of my salvation yet. Back then, I was away from my family. My answer: “Since, I am about to die, my wish would be for myself. I would wish that I could be saved and go to heaven. “
Looking back, I would have had answered differently if I were already secured of my salvation then. I would have had answered differently if only I had a family.
Everything is different now, and as a mom, I would want to be there for Andy in every step of the way.